To read this creation in another language, request a translation by clicking the “Google Translate ” widget.

Mario Ilașcu participated in the 5th International Literary Creation Competition, from Iași, Romania and is 17 years old. Mario is guided by Mrs. Professor Cristina Maria Frumos at the Pedagogical College „Vasile Lupu” Iași. We congratulate him and his professor and parents for the result and invite you to read another piece of his work!

A lonely bird 

Scrawny talons successfully grabbed the spoon ahead of them after a couple attempts and I began slurping a lukewarm soup. I was alone at my table in the cafeteria, obnoxiously clean pearly-white walls enclosing the place. Asides from men-birds of every kind, the only visual stimuli was coming from the large machinery delimited by a way too low railing in the middle of the room, a nuclear reactor which speared the whole laboratory compound, forming a tower which pierced both the ceiling and the floor.
I'm the only blackbird on this floor, which is why I'm eating alone, not that it is prohibited to sit at a table with a different species, but it just doesn't happen. I should not need mention that birds are much less alike each other than people are and unfortunately, as with race matters, it seems difficult for a man to get comfortable with someone that looks unlike them. Though I will confess solitude doesn't come off as much of a discomfort for me since socializing oftentimes has presented itself as a rather awkward experience.
I sat thinking of the unwise choice of constructing a facility around a nuclear reactor when a blotch of feathery brownness covered my vision of it. A couple seconds must have passed from when I first thought they were merely passing by before looking up and realising they were staring at me.
"Can I sit?" She asked, at which I was too bewildered to respond verbally so I just gave her a small nod, and she sat down. Was she a blackbird? She looked like me, beady eyes in a carpet of feathers with a beak planted in the middle of her face, just brown instead of black. Was that just a female trait? I assumed it was, since I was certainly not going to ask for something I should probably know. The dense fog of tension started forming between us, as is usual of strangers sharing a relatively close space. At first I thought of something to say out of politeness, but I decided I'd rather not force her into unnecessary conversation and just continued my meal.
"You probably thought 'What...? A blackbird, but she's not black!' " She started, then cowered towards the end of her phrase, seeming to regret it as she heard herself.
I let out a rapid nasal exhale in amusement at hearing her, feeling slightly glad she spoke up. "Well, yeah, that's precisely what I thought."
"Precisely...?" She nuanced, with a slightly intrigued glance at which I returned her confusion. "I just thought- I never heard it spoken before, you know, by someone's who's not a doctor, not like I met many people but still..."
"No, yeah, I understand, at times I just try to put in fancy words in my speech- I mean precisely is not fancy, just not commonly used in that way and stuff- I certainly don't wanna sound like some Shakespeare." From another look she gave me, I could tell she didn't know who I was reffering to.
"Am I supposed to know who he is?"
"Well, I understand if you haven't read him, he's got a really peculiar style."
"Read him? Read him from where?"
"Well, there are such things called books-"
"From where did you smuggle a book?"
"Shakespeare's not that rare- wait- did you mean you've never asked your doctor for a book- like you've never tried or?"
"Well... it's not like my doctor would listen, I'm surprised your's did."
I could tell, by a certain venom in her voice, that she had a completely different experience with her doctor to me, which made me feel a bit bad. Dr. Arkanam Thaddeus was always very careful and nice, and gave me pretty much anything I asked for within reason, but of course, if there were good doctors, there could also be bad ones. 
"I can give you books if you want..." I offered in a slight pity.
"It's fine, I wouldn't wanna get you in trouble." 
"My doctor will be totally cool with it."
This time she did seem to want to accept it, but a feeling of shame was impeding her, reason for which she would make clear, she looked slightly downwards. "I dunno' how to read..."
Did her doctor really never teach her? I felt anger at first then a sudden surge of duty compelled me to offer her help.
"I can teach you."
She raised her glance, then she smiled warmly, a genuine smile, as much as her beaked countenance could show which instantly reached my heart. "Sure."
We established to spend 20 of the 50 minutes of daily cafeteria time learning to read and write then I found out the whole extent of her condition. She apparently had no tv, had never seen a movie before or had even gotten any writing tools or paper to draw or scribble on as a child. Her doctor, which is fully responsible for her growth as her sole teacher from infancy to release, had merely done by his contract, doing his tests, but caring for nothing else, which I could then assume would be the case for a large majority of doctors in this complex, and that I had merely gotten lucky with mine. Mediocrity is something no one should strive for when you're in care of someone else. This' how I was taught and this' how I should teach.
Once I got to my room again I felt much more eager to spend time with Thaddeus, which I had previously taken for granted. The chamber is fairly small, a hospital bed, a clock, a calendar, a couple bookshelves, a desk, a tv, some plant pots, some medical machinery and connected to it is a bathroom and there were tubes which were connected with the reactor and passed through all the rooms. I continued my read of a russian novel until my doctor came in.
"Hello Matthew!" He greeted as he came in and started assembling something on the desk, wearing his ussual coat, leather vest, gloves and boots, brown trousers and long nosed mask, akin to a plague doctor's. As I sat up, I immediately realized that I had never asked for the girl's name and that I hadn't offered mine either, I made a mental note to do it next time. "I was informed that a female blackbird, 19- one year younger than you, is going to be transferred here from a couple floors below sometime this week... She's-"
"Oh, yeah- I was about to talk about her, I already met her in the cafeteria."
He turned towards me, slightly surprised, then turned back to his tinkering. "Really? How was it?"
"She's quite fun and light-hearted... She's illiterate though, is that common?"
"I cannot say for certain but I would be inclined to believe so, we're not really paid for being much else than a scientist and so most of my colleagues don't bother and it's incredibly difficult to learn such things alone."
"Is it hard to teach? Reading and writing at this age I mean."
"Oh, do you intend to teach her? It's not so difficult as it might be tedious, it will take a while. But I'm very, very glad you're choosing to do it. I'm proud of you!" He came over to the bed with a long metal tube in hand and ruffled the feathers on my head with his other gloved hand, digits of which look and feel slightly like claws. He then connected the tube to a machine just at the foot of the bed, the tube ended in a mask that covered only my beak and nostrils. He told me to relax and breathe regularly as he put it on me. After a minute or so, he removed it, read the readings on the machine then wrote it down. These kind of tests were never scary for me, Thaddeus always told me when and why it was going to hurt, like the insertion on the bone marrow test.
"Do you want me to get you an abecedarium?" He offered.
"I think I'd prefer to write it myself on paper." I answered. "Oh, also, I've been meaning to ask..."
He sat down on the bed next to me and looked expectantly. 
"Why do you dress like this? And also, is Arkanam Thaddeus your real name?" It felt weird that he always wore a mask since I've seen many others doctors who didn't. For what I knew, he could be a bird too, hiding a beak under that mask, I've always had that theory in mind.
He let out a half-chuckle "No, no, it's like a pseudonym, my real one is just an average german name, I just thought Arkanam Thaddeus sounded cool for a scientist, we all have fake names, for anonymity."
"It does sound cool, something out of a fantasy book-"
"As for my appearance, well, I had actually prepared an answer for when you'd ask me but I umh, forgot it, I'll tell you when I remember."
"Alright..." I replied, then continued "Thank you doctor... for taking care of me I mean."
He put his arm around me in a half hug "Aw, of course Matthew, you're very precious to me." He prolonged the hug for a while, then got up and walked towards the door, he waved, I waved back, then left.
I met with her the next day, already seated in the same spot as yesterday. She told me she wasn't given a name but she chose her own at around 13, Lucy and I told her Thaddeus had named me Matthew. After we finished eating and some more talk, which was mostly her complaining about the food and the tests and the lifelessness of the place and the lack of freedom, all of which I personally didn't mind much but could sympathize with, we got to her education. I had written the alphabet in capital letters on a piece of paper and also brought a pen and other sheets of paper, she recognized some of the letters, A through G, M, O, and X, I taught her how all of them sounded and exemplified with words, it was difficult in the beginning as I gauged how much she knew but then it was a fairly steady rhythm, it took a lot of patience but by the end of the first day, she had more or less learned most of the alphabet though she still made some mistakes. 
It took about a week before she'd learn it entirely, corelating the symbols with the sounds, then learning to write them was easy enough and she managed to write her own name. After a couple months she could already read while also beginning to understand what she was reading. In time, we got closer and closer, our conversations flowing naturally, each interaction a warm blanket over my heart, on chambers which books couldn't cover, always awaiting the next day, always thinking about what I said and what I'd say and how I'd teach, always thinking about her, the warmth of her presence and her honest smile. At night-time I oftentimes found myself staring at the ceiling for hours on end with Lucy as the sole occupant of my mind.
"You're in love Matthew." Thaddeus remarked at one point, and my first instinct was to deny him but he could be right, I had thought of the possibility before as well. My symptoms were weirdly simimilar to what I had read. Fluttering in the stomach, a warmth in the heart, a tinge of lust, continuously thinking of that person, wanting to protect them and admiring them. Even though I knew in the back of my mind it was just an artificial process cultivated along my entire genealogy to entice me to reproduce, I was still grateful for whatever chemicals in my body allowed me to feel this way. It was something that I would want to feel for the rest of my life. It fulfilled me.
One day, when we were wrapping up our lesson on lowercase letters, sitting next to me, she let her head rest on my shoulder. I welcomed the touch, bringing an arm to the side of her head. "I should show you something..." She said in a mellow tone.
"Okay...?" I responded once a few seconds passed.
"It's in my room, I'll bring it tomorrow." She explained with the same softness. I couldn't help but be curious, from what I knew, she couldn't really have brought anything into her room, maybe it's something that she found in it, like a diary of an old occupant. I thought to press her for informatiom but I could abstain for one day. We stood like this for a bit more, then got back to our rooms.
Next day arrived and I was fairly eager to know what Lucy would bring, though obviously, I kept it for myself, in case she'd reconsidered, she sat next to me on the bench. She was holding something in her right hand but kept it out of my vision for the moment, at first it looked like she was going to say something, then stopped and thought for a moment, she stretched her hand towards me and opened it, motioning for me to take it. I grabbed it gently, it was an egg. About the size of a chicken egg but blue-green with brown spots. An ashamed look took over her eyes. "There were four but I only managed to keep one of them- supposedly, they won't hatch."
I could tell it meant something to her. I first wanted to ask the obvious question, if she had laid them, even if it was implied, I still asked since I didn't think of anything else to say.
"Yeah I laid them, I don't want to get into it though." She paused, then continued "I want you to have it- if.. you want to take it."
"Yeah, of course, thank you- are you.. sure though- that you want me to have it?"
"Mhm." She said, laying her head on my shoulder while ruffling through feathers on my chest, preening a couple old feathers on the way.
"Do you.. does it... feel like being a mother, in a way?"
"Well... I wouldn't know right? But I do feel different. It's helped me understand that I'm wasting my life here.. I want out... I want to see.. stuff." A melancholic undertone rang in her voice.
"We're getting out soon, with a lot of money too, we'll get to do stuff..."
"Do you really trust that? Besides, it's not soon, it's half a decade, 6 years for me- I can't wait that long-"
"Yes I trust it, Thaddeus- my doctor wouldn't lie, I know him well, I trust him."
I replied rather hurriedly.
"I still don't want to wait 6 years, it feels like I'll be dead by then, looking at the same walls, eating the same food, same tests, same everything, also looking at all these freaks just helps remind me that I am one too, merely an experiment. A carpet with sticks for arms and legs, we're not birds, we don't even have wings!"
I empathized with her distress, carresing her back with a few digits, all were things I have thought of before. "I understand... but there's nothing we can really do, I have thought of escaping before but Thaddeus once told me about all the security measures and it's just not an option." 
"We can blow that thing up." Lucy glanced towards the nuclear reactor.
I was stupefied by her proposal, wondering if it was a joke at first, then realising it wasn't.
"Come on- I don't know much about this stuff but I can tell it's one loose screw away from exploding." She continued. 
Contrary to the rest of the facility which was pristine and well-endowed, the monumental machine in the middle seemed poorly-maintenanced and rusty. Though certainly not in good condition, it was not quite 'one loose screw away from exploding' as she'd put it. I imagined there were numerous safety precautions for something this hazardous either way. But even if it could be sabotaged, it'd certainly be too dangerous for everyone here.
"Everyone- well, a lot of people would die, we can't just blow it up." I stated. The whole idea seemed ludicrous to me.
"Everyone born or working here is already dead. This isn't living. I've been thinking about it for some time- I wouldn't mind a small chance of dying to be free." Lucy contested.
I had befallen to thought for a moment. She was kinda right, I wouldn't have wished living in this place to anyone, even if I myself, could bear it well, and that only because of a good doctor and access to books and television, which many others lacked.
I sighed, then replied "I understand... I'll think of other options... and of that." What right had we to decide the fate of everyone here? And the research too, maybe it amounted to something, all the work would burn down with the place. Besides, depending on the power of the reactor, everything around could get affected as well. For a moment, I wondered if she'd thought of these things, then convinced myself she must have an idea of what it meant.
She ran her beak somewhere along my neck and chin in a suave nuzzling motion "Not like there's nothing good here, I have you."
Once I got back to my room, I couldn't help but think of her proposal. Sneaking out of here without some distraction was definitely not an option, my doctor had told me had tried a couple times in my infancy, and a regular fire won't be enough of a distraction since we'd just get stuck at a lower floor. After a half-hour, Thaddeus walked in, just to check on me, as he often did. After some conversation, I willed myself to ask. "Do you know anything about the reactor in the middle of the cafeteria?" 
"Ah- well, I'm not an expert in that field but I know it's a fast breeder reactor.. Not very safe since it needs a large amount of liquid sodium for cooling which can quickly combust with either air or water, that's probably why they built this place in the middle of nowhere, besides anonymity- but... you shouldn't worry about it, from the documents I received when I first got recruited here, it should hold out fine, at least mechanically, you're not in any danger."
"I see... could someone tamper with it?" I faked a slight hint of concern in my voice, which quickly made me feel guilty at using his trust in me in this manner.
"I mean, if you threw something hard enough, it would probably break through the surface layer, but it is not likely anything would happen- I have heard of a few cases of this occurring in the last decade actually, it seems such acts of revolt keep happening more often with time, even if the ones above managed to stop the news from spreading, they almost activated the evacuation measures one time... I'm sorry to admit that if something did hit in the right place, like where they keep the sodium, only the doctors and files would get out before they tried evacuating all of you, it would probably be too late by that point- don't worry, I'd try my best to smuggle you out in such a case..." 
I was surprised to hear there had been other such instances of anarchy, it helped me see the place with a much less biased view, and suddenly, helped by knowing the area around the facility was desolate, blowing the place up didn't seem so ridiculous anymore, and more of a natural progression of things. I'd have guessed many would have already done it if they could. "Thank you Thaddeus."
The meetings with Lucy the next weeks were incredibly fun as she had started reading literature recently and could form a mental picture of how the outside world was. We spoke about many things we would do once out. I told her I had started forming a plan in case we decided to follow through with it, which seemed more likely with each passing day. It would have to be during the monthly general inspections, everyone would be locked in their rooms so there wouldn't be anyone guarding the cafeteria. I would make an excuse to my doctor about how I wanted to give Lucy a letter and then, throwing a sort of short spear made from a metal bar from around the railing straight through a thicker metal ring, since I assumed that is where the liquid sodium reserve lay inside the machine, it should instantly make an explosion. Once they figure it will inevitably lead to a nuclear disaster, they should activate the evacuation measures. It should take at least around an hour and at most two for the nuclear blast to occur if I hit the right place, which should give me enough time to get Lucy out of her room, get out of the facility and walk about eight kilometers far before it explodes, and although that is still about half the safe limit for the initial impact and will probably present itself in some side effects, it will not kill us. 
Days flew by and we soon found ourselves one day before the next monthly inspection. I had thought and dreamed of every detail in the plan, made all the preparations necessary, but incredible doubt still lingered.
"Matthew, it's fine if you decide you're not ready..." Lucy affirmed, head laying on my lap. At first the position felt a bit awkward to me in public, but I got used to it in time.
"You deserve freedom Lucy, we all do. This is not the time for me to be Hamlet, stagnancy leads to tragedy or boredom, I should have done this sooner."
"You should wait until I get to Shakespeare before referencing him again."
I giggled, petting her head. "I'd kiss you if I didn't have a beak."
"We can still try.. worst case we just kinda bonk into each other." She said as she sat up, dark-yellow pearls looking into my eyes.
We brought the tip of our beaks togheter, which, as expected wasn't too satisfactory. We then turned our heads sideways in different directions at around a forty-five degree angle each and tried it this way, and although I could feel a little moisture, it wasn't anything too exciting. We soon pulled back.
"Well, love is not in the body." She said, slightly dissapointed but in an accepting and ultimately happy manner.
"Who is that from? I quite like it."
"...Lucy the bird-woman."
That night was quite restless, endless thoughts whirring inside my head which continued into the morning and afternoon. I would have certainly resigned the plan long ago were it not for her. And I wasn't doing it just for her, I was doing it for everyone here, who knew how many generations would be entrapped in this place in the future? Who am I kidding? It is me who wants this to happen. Do purely selfless actions even exist? Isn't sacrifice also a sort of egoistic self-fulfillment? I was doing it for everyone yes, but I was also doing it for me. I wanted out of these walls. I wanted to see the world.
Arkanam Thaddeus walked into the room and locked the door, I sat on the bed, he started preparing the anesthetic syringe and restrains on the desk next to me. I imagine these measures were put in place because the inspectors were quite cowardly. I had the fake letter with the small, short spear inside under my pillow, which weren't checked during inspections and my doctor never scavanged the room either way. I took the letter in hand. "Thaddeus?"
"Yes?" He replied looking towards me, then saw the envelope. "Is that for Lucy?"
"Yeah.. It's fairly important... could I give it to her? We still have a couple minutes until the inspection starts- I'll be quick, I'll just slip it under her door."
"Well, I could do it for you. She's in room 47, right? In the other hall."
"Yes, but I'd rather do it on my own..."
He turned and went towards the flower pots lined at the other wall, back towards me, administering water and vitamin D.
"I understand Matthew, but it will have to wait then, they started checking the floors randomly, I cannot risk you getting caught."
It didn't look like I could push it further, would I have to wait until next month? Involuntarily through my visual calculus, an idea revealed itself in my mind, the anesthetic was right next to me and he had his back turned. Anxiously, I slowly got up and with small steps and shaky breaths, I grabbed the syringe. He would forgive me, I convinced myself.
"-Remember when you asked me why I dressed like this? Well... it's supposed to be a bird costume with the beak and talons- I suppose I just didn't want you to feel like a lonely bird..." The last sentence he muttered, which would have been fairly inaudible were I not right at his back.
My hand was shaking and my heart was pounding but I still struck, I plunged the syringe into his back, pushing the liquid in.
He let out a cry of surprise and pain, then instinctively grabbed my arm once I tried to flee. I instantly froze, looking back at him.
He took a moment to catch his breath, then another one to process "You could have told me if you wanted to escape Matthew- I would have tried to help.. besides the anesthetic doesn't work like in movies, it takes a couple minutes to settle in..." He let go of my arm and grabbed the syringe out of his back with some difficulty. "I don't know what plan you have but I trust you to succeed, you can take my clothes, it'll be easier to leave as me."
Thaddeus then laid down on the bed and I did as he proposed. After a couple minutes I looked exactly as he used to, my beak fit perfectly in the nose of the mask. Seeing him almost naked like this for the first time was quite weird, as if a spell was broken, he was suddenly as a regular person.
He started speaking with lentitude, clearly under the effects of the anesthesia "Left pocket of my coat... there's a lighter there." I felt it with through my gloved fingers "It's my gift to you.. long story... hope I can tell you sometime." I nodded.
I opened a drawer at my desk, putting Lucy's egg in my left pocket with the lighter, then using my doctor's keycard, I opened the door. I grabbed the spear, waved at him then left.
With hurried steps I got to the cafeteria. Eerily desolate and quiet, which worked for my purpose, I got right next to the railing then took a moment to try and aim. Five meters below me was my target, a fairly thick but rusted metal, with gravity helping me, it should go straight through at an angle and cause an explosion instantly if I guessed correctly where the sodium lay.
I mustered up all my strength and threw the spear and just as I registered it out of my hand, a massive pillar of fire flared out with a loud boom. The initial blast stunned me at first, blowing me back a bit. I could feel waves of heat radiating even at this distance, a moment of silence, then a large panick as doors were opening and voices rang out.
Pipes in the cafeteria started bursting, large flames spreading around. I looked back and saw many doctors and people of my kind rushing out of their rooms as flames spewed out of them. The pipes in the rooms were combusting as well. I looked back at my room and a horrifying revelation struck me. Thaddeus was unconscious inside. I ran to the door, which was left ajar and rammed in through it but was quickly repelled by the heat and had to stand back. The alarms started sounding, infernal horns which undermined all other noise. I tried pushing through the flames into the room multiple times but it was much too painful. But even if I got him out of the room, I would have to carry him all the way out, since the moment I had injected him, I had condemned him to death, a death which I could have prevented just by being honest with him. Tears threatened to pour out but I couldn't afford to cry, I had to save Lucy.
The blaring alarms continued as I made my way through the sea of crazed souls to the cafeteria again to reach the other hall, to her room.
I suddenly found myself planted right at her door, the alarm blaring constantly right in my ear drums, I reached to touch the handle, then retracted my hand. For a moment I could feel heat protruding through it. A terrible heat, a blinding heat which made me step away, and away, and away. I walked down the stairs, reached the floor below, then panick struck. I won't let her die! I tried turning back but my body wouldn't budge, I was just walking down and down and down. Pained screeching and fire all around me until only the alarm remained. Even through the forest, even through the open fields, it remained. 
Then a loud burst and a shockwave. The nuclear disaster. Neutron bullets shooting through the air. After many hours or days of walking I reached what seemed to be an abandoned farm house, I got to the bed, then exhausted and nauseated, I went to sleep.



Secret laboratory discovered after nuclear disaster
Mysterious doctor the only known survivor
North Rhine-Westphalia - Government claims having no knowledge or affiliation with a mysterious facility built around a dangerous, abandoned FBR (fast breeder reactor), which has had a nuclear meltdown on 17/9/2008 between 17:30 and 19:00. A full statement is yet to be issued upon the matter. Due to the nuclear blast, the city was shortly evacuated, self-proclaimed doctor "Arkanam Thaddeus" was found in an abandoned farm home 40 kilometers away, refuses to divulge information, being the only known survivor up to date.



Various plants riddle the room, vines climbing on the walls and sprouts growing out of their pots, monstera leaves grossly spreading out like arachnid legs, asides from them and a smell of gasoline, the room is almost identical to my old one.
I had a nightmare. I was back then, right in front of her room but I opened the door this time, I saw her swallowed in flames, she looked at me as she burnt and I looked at her until she turned to dust. I have acute radiation syndrome, my feathers are falling out and a tumor seeps out my strenght, giving me roughly only three more years. I believe I have what is commonly called survivor's guilt, though being aware of it doesn't make it better. I often have auditory hallucinations, the fire, the screaming, their voices, but most oftenly it's the alarms, those sirens, for hours on end. I haven't taken the suit off since then, it feels like part of my skin now. I still read, I still watched movies, I even tried exploring the world, visiting most of Europe and a couple cities in Japan, Norway and America but nothing changed inside. Having taken the name of my doctor, my fatherly figure, also felt wrong, especially since I was the one who killed him.
I laid on the floor. It would be a fitting end to feel what they felt, I thought. I reached for the lighter in my left pocket, there was something else in there too, I took it out. An egg, her egg.



Nobel prize for medicine awarded to Dr. Arkanam Thaddeus regarding a reliable cure to bird cancer
4 June 2024 - Dr. Arkanam Thaddeus, sole survivor in infamous nuclear meltdown finds a 92% reliable cure for cancer regarding all animals of class Aves, potential breakthrough in curing all animal and human cancer.